.

pan's shadow

i saw ghosts everywhere on the drive home tonight.
in fact there was one in my back seat.
i wanted to talk to him but
as we passed under a flashing yellow
i looked in the rear view mirror and saw him scribbling notes in a pad on his lap.

when i creeped in the door, holding my keys tightly
i saw anothers face outlined by the shadow
from the tiny light spilling out of the kitchen.
his height alone should have tipped me off,
should have known he'd be gone when i flicked on the hall switch.

and as i glance over my shoulder
feeling his gaze on my back while i write this
i get that heat rising up my neck and
the goosebumps appear quickly on my bare legs
not quite knowing whether or not to be afraid of what he'll have to say.

i saw ghosts everywhere on the drive home tonight.
there were two walking past me
so i waited patiently for them to cross
remembering the night i made him turn around
and take me home and tuck me in while i shivered and shook and wept for hours.

i saw ghosts everywhere on the drive home tonight
and
i waited patiently for one of them to say something.
i thought i would be scared
but
ive never been more fearless.